I’m a bit late to this, but I want to acknowledge that October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month.
Pregnancy loss occurs in all kinds of ways, including miscarriage, stillbirth, abortion, or death shortly after birth, and regardless of how or why it happens, it’s important to acknowledge and support the families that are experiencing this.
Looking at miscarriage specifically, it’s really common with 10-25% of clinically recognized pregnancies ending in miscarriage. Factor in the early pregnancies that people didn’t even know about and that number rises even higher.
In spite of the fact that this is so common, it’s still something that people feel shame and embarrassment about and that friends, families, and even health professionals often don’t know how to deal with.
I’ve heard stories of people responding to being told of a miscarriage with statements like, “don’t worry, you can have another one,” or “it probably wasn’t a viable pregnancy anyway.”
While these statements may be factually true, they are disrespectful to what the parents are experiencing and don’t acknowledge the pain and grief that is taking place. The best thing you can do is ask your friends how they are feeling and treat it like you would any other situation of death and mourning.
One of my Justisse colleagues has a weekly podcast called Fertility Friday, and she had a great episode last week talking about this subject. Check it out here.
Please remember, while it may be common, it’s still a death and you don’t need to tough it out on your own. There’s lots of places you can get help and I hope you find what you need soon.
If you are looking for help you can check out the Pregnancy and Infant Loss Network who have links to support services, education, and training for parents and also health professionals.
For those of you who have experienced this, I am so sorry for your loss, and I hope you can find the support you need to get through this.
One of the great things about the fertility awareness method is that it can help you identify where you may have some hormonal imbalances and help you reduce your chances of early pregnancy loss. If this is something you have struggled with please get in touch and we can see if I can help you.